Chris Conidis Artist, Author, Screenwriter
Chris Conidis is a versatile writer, filmmaker, and improv performer with a career spanning over two decades. His work includes satire, social commentary, and dark humor, often exploring themes like societal critique, futurism, and absurdity.
Writer and former artist, Chris Conidis is back at it, in the latest work-in-progress, “Progress City,” a sharp satire that takes a deep, comical dive into society’s love affair with “progress.” This new project, a sprawling parody of futurism and modern life, unpacks humanity’s journey from the cave to today’s social dilemmas. With his trademark humor, Conidis pokes fun at how every era has imagined the future—often with more confidence than accuracy—and how these visions have both shaped and clashed with reality.
Introducing Progress City – A Satirical Journey Through Our Obsession with "Advancement"
This sprawling parody of futurism and modern life peels back the layers of our societal quirks, from our earliest beginnings to the complex dilemmas of today.
*Progress City* invites us to reflect on what it really means to move forward—and at what cost.
Check out the official press release for more insights into the inspiration behind this project: [Read here)
Let me know what you think about this satirical dive into the future and our present!
https://www.crunchbase.com/person/chris-conidis-adaa
#ProgressCity #Satire #Futurism #SocialCommentary #ChrisConidis
Chris Conidis: The Time-Traveling Master of Mediocrity
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Chris Conidis sprinkles in some historical trivia, and tears apart pop culture like a kid with a piñata. Ever wonder what it takes to be an expert in absolutely nothing? Look no further. Known for his ability to leave no trace in the annals of history, He is a distinguished master of “meh.” While some aim for fame, he is content on being the unsung hero of mediocre pursuits, championing the art of sarcastic observation and the pursuit of temperate achievements.He’s not here to change the world…He is just here to rearrange the deck chairs while the ship goes down...
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Born in the depths of prehistoric humanity—probably while someone was inventing the wheel—Conidis started his career as a caveman, slowly chiseling away at rocks and cracking his first sarcastic comment. Back then, there were no influencers, just basic survival and the occasional woolly mammoth scare. Conidis was ahead of his time, the original social media pioneer—drawing stick figures on cave walls to the disinterest of any Neanderthal within a 10-mile radius. No followers, no problem.
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As time ticked on and human history fumbled its way forward, Conidis stayed in the mix, dodging plagues, bad haircuts, and even worse fashion trends (seriously, tunics?) with the same finesse he now uses to avoid online trolls. While everyone else was busy building empires, he was busy telling Socrates, “Hey, man, why not take a break and just chill? You’re overthinking this whole philosophy thing.” Of course, his toga party ideas didn't exactly take off, and his critique of democracy was something like: “Yeah, democracy... or should I say, Demo-Crazy?”
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Conidis gave the Egyptians a hand in designing the pyramids, suggesting, “Have you thought about making them triangle-shaped? I mean, it’s just an idea.” Fast forward to the Dark Ages—Conidis was there too, trying to make fire jokes, but the crowd just wasn’t ready. #TooSoon.
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Then came the Renaissance—oh, what a time to be alive! Conidis was rubbing elbows with Da Vinci, telling him, “Ever thought about, like, flying or something?” and witnessing revolutions unfold, many of which he considered “way too dramatic.” He dodged cannonballs in the French Revolution like it was no big deal and spent a good amount of time roasting Napoleon’s height—"You're really that short in person?" Classic Conidis.
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And then, just when you thought the madness couldn’t get any worse... enter the modern era. Selfies, hashtags, and TikTok dances. Conidis, still sporting a confused look from the previous century, couldn’t believe it. “Wait, so we went from inventing fire to lip-syncing to pop songs on a tiny screen? How did I miss that memo?” he wondered aloud.
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Today, he spends his days in utter bewilderment, watching humanity become obsessed with filters, likes, and viral nonsense. "Cave paintings at least had some culture," he quips. A seasoned time traveler, Conidis is still trying to figure out how the human race went from inventing the wheel to... unboxing videos. Through it all, Conidis remains a witness to the spectacle—armed with sarcasm sharper than a medieval sword and a humor that has survived and roasted the ages.
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https://www.crunchbase.com/person/chris-conidis-adaa
https://www.chrisconidisflorida.com/
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Progress City™ Real Estate: Because Who Needs Privacy, Parking, or a Living Room?
In Progress City™ Real Estate, we redefine the very idea of “home” in ways you never asked for! Forget everything you know about cozy spaces, sanity, and affordability, because here in Progress City™, we take real estate to a whole new level of unnecessary complexity and ridiculous expense.
Our Exquisite™ Housing Options
1. The Glass Cage Loft™
Do you love the idea of constant visibility? With floor-to-ceiling windows on every wall, this loft ensures you’ll always be in the spotlight—whether you want it or not. Perfect for those who think blinds are “so last century,” this option comes complete with reflective glass, so you can wave to your own reflection instead of neighbors!
2. The Pocket Pod™
For the minimalist who’s taken minimalism to an uncomfortable extreme. At 80 square feet, the Pocket Pod™ includes a bed (sort of), a sink (tiny), and even a shelf (for a single spoon). Cooking and bathrooms? Well, that’s what the Community™ Kitchen and Hygiene Hub down the hall are for! Who needs a kitchen or a private bathroom when you have communal facilities… somewhere?
3. The Shared Terrace Studio™
Why waste money on a balcony when you can pay slightly less to share a rooftop terrace with 100 other residents? Enjoy the thrill of jostling for a spot on a wooden bench as you enjoy “city views” (a.k.a., views of other people’s apartments). Just beware: the only privacy here is the illusion of it.
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How to Acquire Property in Progress City™
Step 1: Pass the Application Gauntlet™
Applying is a breeze! First, you’ll submit a 300-question personality test, prove your “visionary” credentials, and provide three letters of recommendation from people who barely know you. Don’t have three letters? No worries! You can purchase the Premium Applicant Package™ for only $999.99 to bypass this step.
Step 2: Meet Our Elite Residency Requirements™
To ensure our residents “embody the Progress City™ ethos,” you’ll need a subscription to a minimum of four productivity apps, a gym membership you’ll never use, and evidence of at least one start-up failure. This step helps us weed out the weak and identify those who truly understand modern urban living.
Step 3: Attend the Housing Hunger Games™
Housing in Progress City™ is fiercely competitive, so every quarter, we host the Housing Hunger Games™. Successful applicants will gather in our Exclusive Application Arena™, where they’ll compete in events like Extreme Networking, Speed Emailing, and the LinkedIn Endorsement Sprint™. Only the top 10 finishers will have the privilege of choosing from our limited, highly coveted vacancies.
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Why Choose Progress City™ Real Estate?
In Progress City™, you’re not just buying a home; you’re buying into a lifestyle. Embrace a world where floor plans make no sense, walls are always made of glass, and comfort is merely an optional add-on.
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Zero-Privacy Living™: Because “open-concept” is a lifestyle, not just a design.
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Unnecessary Flexibility™: Floorplans that transform from “Bedroom” to “Office” to “Room Where You Have Existential Crises” with a few quick adjustments.
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Next-Level Amenities™: An “Eco-Friendly Trash Chute” that only accepts biodegradable items (hope you enjoy composting), a “Community Charger Hub” with two outlets, and “Smart Locks” that may or may not let you in when you forget your passcode.
Act Now! Your Ridiculous Future Awaits!
Don’t miss out on the lifestyle you never wanted! Contact one of our Progress City™ Real Estate Ambassadors (they’re real estate agents in snazzier outfits) to book a virtual tour of the apartment you’ll probably only get to rent. And remember, our motto: Why Live Simply, When You Can Live Progressively™?
Progress City™ Real Estate — Where Your Housing Dreams Come True, as long as your dream involves confusing layouts, public amenities, and overinflated rents.